An interesting election yesterday in the northern halal. And what a contrast. As cousins across the West begin a slight and fitful rousing from a long opium dream, Canadians found another liberal vein and reclined euphorically into their own filth. This fantasizing boy-band country will now be whimsically fronted by Justin. I believe his surname is Bieber, though whatever it’s one his wife couldn’t be enticed to share.
However foundered on lotus blossoms Canadian voters may be, I vaguely wonder if the results were somewhat analogous to the American election of 2008. This being a period when the well-earned contempt for Bush neocons culminated in such a frenzy that some bat-earred alien called “Barack Obama” actually seemed preferable to some. And given McCain’s taste for mushroom clouds, perhaps it was. Though that’s just my own musing. For the remainder of this post, we’ll turn to our Canadian bureau chief. Jeppo, what’s your evaluation of the election results?
An unmitigated disaster. Le Dauphin has promised to massively increase immigration, simultaneously promote Islam *and* homosexuality, and legalize drugs and prostitution. Trump will need to build a northern wall as well.
Looking at the ten major metro areas, conservatism is utterly extinct in Greater Montreal and Halifax. The Conservatives finished third and even fourth in most of the ridings in these areas.
The Liberals basically swept Toronto, Ottawa, Hamilton, Winnipeg and Vancouver. The Tories were almost completely wiped out, only holding on to a few seats in the far exurbs.
The Conservatives did win big in metro Calgary (11 of 13 seats), Edmonton (8 of 11) and, surprisingly, Quebec City (8 of 10). The latter might be Harper’s biggest political accomplishment; establishing a beachhead in otherwise ultra-liberal Quebec.
Jason Kenney’s (one of Harper’s chief ministers) “curry in a hurry” ethnic outreach strategy is in tatters. Of the 40 (out of 338) ridings where non-whites are the majority, the Conservatives won only 3, compared to half of them in the 2011 election.
The only reason for that relative success was the one-time collapse of the Liberal party in 2011, but Kenney and co. believed their own propaganda that, uniquely among centre-right parties in the Western world, the Canadian Tories’ constant appeasement of minorities would pay permanent political dividends. Nope.
Kenney is probably the favourite to succeed Harper as Conservative leader, so I hope publicizing the total failure of his strategy trips up his leadership ambitions. No cuckolds need apply.
If Canada is to be saved I think the new leader will have to come from Quebec. Even though the province is very liberal in a social and economic sense, they have an unashamed collective nationalism, xenophobia even, that is virtually unknown in the rest of North America.
So maybe a nationalist/populist leader could emerge from the Quebec City region, a froggy Trump as it were. A couple of possible names are Maxime Bernier and Gerard Deltell. But the next four years are going to be fucking brutal.