O Canada

An interesting election yesterday in the northern halal. And what a contrast. As cousins across the West begin a slight and fitful rousing from a long opium dream, Canadians found another liberal vein and reclined euphorically into their own filth. This fantasizing boy-band country will now be whimsically fronted by Justin. I believe his surname is Bieber, though whatever it’s one his wife couldn’t be enticed to share.

However foundered on lotus blossoms Canadian voters may be, I vaguely wonder if the results were somewhat analogous to the American election of 2008. This being a period when the well-earned contempt for Bush neocons culminated in such a frenzy that some bat-earred alien called “Barack Obama” actually seemed preferable to some. And given McCain’s taste for mushroom clouds, perhaps it was. Though that’s just my own musing. For the remainder of this post, we’ll turn to our Canadian bureau chief. Jeppo, what’s your evaluation of the election results?

An unmitigated disaster. Le Dauphin has promised to massively increase immigration, simultaneously promote Islam *and* homosexuality, and legalize drugs and prostitution. Trump will need to build a northern wall as well.


Looking at the ten major metro areas, conservatism is utterly extinct in Greater Montreal and Halifax. The Conservatives finished third and even fourth in most of the ridings in these areas.

The Liberals basically swept Toronto, Ottawa, Hamilton, Winnipeg and Vancouver. The Tories were almost completely wiped out, only holding on to a few seats in the far exurbs.

The Conservatives did win big in metro Calgary (11 of 13 seats), Edmonton (8 of 11) and, surprisingly, Quebec City (8 of 10). The latter might be Harper’s biggest political accomplishment; establishing a beachhead in otherwise ultra-liberal Quebec.

Jason Kenney’s (one of Harper’s chief ministers) “curry in a hurry” ethnic outreach strategy is in tatters. Of the 40 (out of 338) ridings where non-whites are the majority, the Conservatives won only 3, compared to half of them in the 2011 election.

The only reason for that relative success was the one-time collapse of the Liberal party in 2011, but Kenney and co. believed their own propaganda that, uniquely among centre-right parties in the Western world, the Canadian Tories’ constant appeasement of minorities would pay permanent political dividends. Nope.

Kenney is probably the favourite to succeed Harper as Conservative leader, so I hope publicizing the total failure of his strategy trips up his leadership ambitions. No cuckolds need apply.

If Canada is to be saved I think the new leader will have to come from Quebec. Even though the province is very liberal in a social and economic sense, they have an unashamed collective nationalism, xenophobia even, that is virtually unknown in the rest of North America.

So maybe a nationalist/populist leader could emerge from the Quebec City region, a froggy Trump as it were. A couple of possible names are Maxime Bernier and Gerard Deltell. But the next four years are going to be fucking brutal.


13 thoughts on “O Canada

  1. Amazing. Canada sees hordes of Muslims trash Europe and thinks this looks good, lets do that here. Though there is plenty of space up in say The Northwest Territories or Nunavut. I’m sure they’d love it there.

    Calgary, the land of the Stampede. Edmonton, home of the Oilers. Canadian ‘fly over’ country. Good for them and for Quebec City. I always liked how French Canadians were rude to English speaking Canadians and tolerated Americans, it makes me laugh. It’s so passive aggressive in a weirdly Canadian way.

    Bye Canada, it was nice knowing ya. I was sorry about Burger King buying Timmy’s but screw it.

  2. There is just no hope in any mainstream party anywhere. We can only watch in the hope that one might be slower in destroying us than the others.

    By the way, Jeppo, I thought the Quebecois’ “xenophobia” was directed mostly towards English-speaking Canadians? It’s great if they’re truly nationalistic and race-conscious.

  3. When I was a boy, a friend and I would periodically assault our boredom with a mad scientist mixing game. We would comb through our bathrooms, kitchens, and garages finding various liquids we thought might generate some interesting alchemy. Bug spray, vinegar, and rubbing alcohol? Kerosene, pickle juice, and windex?

    I suppose we were easy to entertain because the more ludicrous the combination, the louder we cackled with anticipation. I think we vaguely hoped that one might open a gate to the 8th dimension, or at least produce a leprechaun. Whatever the result, the greatest delight was in striving for the most combustible mix possible.

    How gratifying to think nominal adults now operate whole countries on the same premise.

  4. Pingback: O Canada | Reaction Times

  5. We’re officially in a recession here in Bizzarroland though that doesn’t seem to carry any weight when deciding whether to bring in 10,000 unwashed migrants or airlift 25,000 immediately as per Turdeau’s plan…not bringing any is of course out of the question. It wouldn’t bode well for fleeting “feels” and moral preening to use cold hard logic when deciding the fate of a nation. Sometimes I think legacy Canadians are more akin to amoeba’s than homo’s..err.. homo sapiens, feeling their way through the political landscape and reacting somewhat logically only when tactile feedback is provided.

    • I know feels trump bills everywhere but the boardroom, though it truly is a marvel of self-delusion to convince oneself that importing legions of trough feeders and treasury solvents are actually going to accrue to your economic benefit.

      How much do I have to pay this guy before I get rich?

  6. Thanks Porter. LOL to “fantasizing boy band country”, that’s it in a nutshell.


    You’re right, the left-wing civic nationalism in Quebec is mostly directed against Anglos, while warmly welcoming French-speaking Arab terrorists and Haitian criminals. But there is an undercurrent of right-wing ethnic nationalism that exists just below the “official” nationalism of the Parti Quebecois and other mainstream separatist organizations.

    This right-wing nationalism is not really separatist or anti-Canadian, and is opposed to mass immigration, multiculturalism and Islamization. It exists in provincial parties like the unfortunately-acronymed CAQ, heir to the ADQ, Creditistes and Union Nationale, so it has a long pedigree in Quebec politics.

    It is centred in the Quebec City metro area and especially the region south of it stretching to the Maine border. This area, unlike Montreal, is very homogenous: almost entirely white, French-speaking and Catholic. Some of it might be a regional rivalry and reaction towards the bigger and more powerful left-wing nationalist movement based out of Montreal.

    Through a lot of hard work, Stephen Harper has pried these people away from the separatist Bloc Quebecois at the federal level, and towards the Conservative party. It may be his greatest political legacy. Because if any right-wing nationalist leader ever emerges in Canada, it will be a goose-stepping, sieg-heiling pure-white snowlord from Quebec City.


    • That seems a similar picture, in general, to Europe. Many regional separatists feel more resentment towards their national governments than to the hordes of invaders. But there are some exceptions, such the Belgian Vlaams Belang and the Italian Lega Nord.

  7. Nothing can be trusted to the voting public. The impact of slowing global markets can be insurmountable. An economy dependent upon commodities like Canada’s was bound to be in deep recession, and the incumbent party punished, almost regardless of the party in power and their policies. A rational and intelligent voter base (homeowners? Net tax payers?) would recognize that prudent economic policies over time would help smooth the volatility. Instead , we get voters who punish helpless incumbents in a fit of hope and change. 100 years ago they would have been somewhat more justified; not so today.

    This brings up the interesting possibility that a future time oriented China could topple western governments almost at will for just a short period of domestic economic pain. I wouldn’t blame them in the least for taking advantage of us in this manner; I’d just be jealous that the only people we’ve ever had in power with such nationalistic machismo are busy getting themselves removed from our currency.

  8. Do you know that the people more against Quebec separatism is the Canadian jews? Canada is a solid Province of the Anglo-Judeo Empire and Quebec is probably the most jew-wise region in the country.

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